Monday, October 26, 2009

bruises are cool?

Is there something about a bruised woman that gets guys super excited? I mean, not bruised in a someone just beat the crap out of you way, but the 'sports' injury kind.

Something you may or may not know about me: I'm crazy in the, I'll try anything once and I'm going to give it all I've got, type of person. So keep this in mind.

Anyways, so I got this huge bruise from a paintball. Most likely because the gun was firing at an 'unsafe' speed of waaay over 275 feet per second and the ball tried to pummel its way through my arm. I mean I was shot point blank in the crotch (yay for no penis) and I was fine, also was shot in the hand and bare forearm and those barely left marks. This bruise is monstrous. I would say about the size of a jawbreaker or a super bouncy ball (about 3 inches (or 7.62cm) in diameter). It started of innocently enough, but quickly became the purple glob of pain.

Apparently these things excite boys. Most people were impressed when they saw it, some were understandably grossed out, but guys were so... intrigued by it. It's like the bruise gave me 100 cool points in the boys club or something. I guess they are impressed that I'm 'tough' enough to sport a massive bruise, or that I'm willing to run around the front lines of a paintball field. I don't know what kind of girls they hang out with, but my friends and I hold our own. We will bungee jump, skydive, board, whatever. Just tell us when and where (busy schedules willing).

But I will just post some great responses I've gotten to the bruise:

1) "HOLY SHIT WTF DID YOU GO PAINTBALLIN NAKED?" (one of my paintball buddies)
2) "OMG OMG OMG EW EW EW." (hehee, gotta love my girly girls)
3) *Blank stare straight at the bruise while grimacing* (she's funny, speechless too I guess)
4) *jaw drop* OH MY GOD WHO DID THAT TO YOU?
6) 'I shouldn't be laughing, but damn woman that is impressive.' (She is awesome)
7) So... something to add to the 'Things Carolyn shouldn't do, but she stupidly does them anyways' list?

I also saw Rent again for the second time this past weekend with OBC members Anthony Rapp and Adam Pascall (again). FRONT ROW!!! They were amazing. Also Nicolette Hart was an amazing Maureen. She mooned us for far too long (not that I'm complaining) and was overall wonderful. In the brief moments after the show as she stood on a chair waving posters and playbills, she paused just long enough to make a silly face at me so I could snap a picture. Oh, she had me with that, who needs hello. I could only smile like a goof as I trotted away.

Oh amazingly talented unattainable women.

Ohhh she also lost her cat ears on the fire escape during the New Years scene. The look on her face was hilarious! Kind of a mix of 'Wtf' with a 'huh... I lost my ears' look. Also, when she sat in her chair (right in front of me) pouting after 'Take Me or Leave Me' a bit of hair was sticking straight up (evil cat ears again perhaps?). It was kind cute.

I wish it was still here so I could see it again. My kid cried as soon as Adam started to sing One Song Glory, out of pure joy. I am pretty sure she was crying for most of the show. No matter how many times I see it... I really do love it every time.


Ashley said...

You're so tough. When I was a kid, I thought bruises made me cool. Now, not so much. I hope you had fun paintballing. I've always wanted to try it.

Brahmin in Boston said...

oooh I think sport bruises on women are as desirable for guys as much as a, say a good looking guy playing with his small cousin and getting along very well - for women?? (ok a very poor analogy but I think you get the picture!)

Hahhahaa your friends were very amusing!! Now the other girlfriends will have to live up to your image. How awesome is that?
Thanks for the comment on the background - I felt the same when I saw it first lol!

Carolyn said...

Ashley- I'm not that tough. I run screaming from spiders. You should try it sometime! It usually does not involve the massive bruising I got. It's kind of fun!

BinB- Yeah, my friends are great heehee. Yeah, guys and kids getting along are so adorable. I don't know some of my friends are considerably tougher than I am (I am a wimp compared to them), but I'm sure the gf's will just pull the gay card on the boys haha.