I forgot to add something in my last post. I met someone, someone I now call my girlfriend. I had no idea during that post that it would turn out to be much. I'm moving across the country in 4 months, and I was not keen on starting a relationship. I am not good with relationships. My friends and coworkers make fun of me for having 'commitment issues', when in reality, if I don't feel it, then I don't pursue it. I don't understand why that's so hard for them to grasp haha.
But... She makes me happy. I actually feel kind of silly writing that, but she makes me smile stupidly, say silly things, and I just feel... happy. Not that I wasn't happy before, but now I'm in that weird happy-relationship kinda thing. Weird.
My friends think it's a match made in medical heaven. I think they're all insane, but her shifts at the hospital and my random pharmacy schedule does make things a bit difficult.
I'm crazy about her. There. I said it. I like her, a lot. And that scares the crap out of me. She knows in four months I'll be living in another state far far away, but we never really breached the subject further than just acknowledging it. Honestly, I just figured we'd have fun and 'whatever happens, happens', but I adore her.
It also doesn't help that the one day off we had together I got an emergency call to work. In my sleepy stupor I agreed to work and asked my coworker to stop sounding so damn peppy when gf asked "Babe... are you talking to your puppy on the phone?" (My coworker has the same name as the pup lol.) I explained that I had to work today and that was recieved with swift kick to my shins and reminding me what today was.
I felt like the world's biggest ass. I don't make good decisions straight from waking up, ever. This is why work attacks me in the morning, they know I'm not coherent. So I was stuck, be an asshole and say that I can't work, or be an asshole and ditch my gf on our break day. After a lot of furious texting and talking with the gf, she relunctantly agreed that I should bail them out. I felt so bad, I was a grumpy butt at work for the first few hours. I felt bad about that too. Today was not the happy day off I was expecting! haha.
She forgave me by the time my lunch break rolled around, and I went skipping back to work the happiest person. My coworkers were baffled. I couldn't explain it. Just knowing she was ok, we were ok, just made my mood so much better. (I texted my coworker that missed his shift saying that if she breaks up with me over this I am holding him soley responsible. haha.)